The Heart VS The Brain

yep its the battle between the two things that cause me the most trouble FIGHTS!

Or to explain it a bit more, I'm in a conflict on making art from the heart or from the brain

When I make something from the heart its usually for just one person I care about or perhaps people I want to open up and admit I care about but don't want to complicate stuff, I don't rely know myself.
But the only goal I want is to make the people I make these things for happy and smile, so I work my ass off to achieve it....... but for some reason I start to feel a bit sad after a while and get the impulse to make more which i begin fear my own feeling . :/

When I make something from Mr Brain here, Its something I know will be popular with passers by (usually a vector from an MLP episode or of a main character. Not being all that talented this is the easiest thing for me to do and I do love seeing my work get lot of faves and even seeing it get used else were. but I don't get the feeling I get from when I make something from the heart.

So maybe I should give my heart a chance...... despite the fact my brain knows the truth that if I follow I'll just be hurting myself worse and worse...... or maybe I'll cage up my heart to avoid pain all together. Considering my track record for following my heart ending in either rejection, getting treated like an object, getting neglected, getting dumped for being "too good" (seriously) and ending up back at square 1

And now I've notice that this has gone from my are to my life :/ bloody hell Echo you need to go one time with out doing this crap.

anywayz nice talking to you Journal, see you soon. I'm gonna go drown my sorrows or maybe just go to bed.